| Tuesday, October 25, 2005 |
| Hardy, har, har, har |
So my soon-to-be 4 year old son asks my mother-in-law:
"Mimi, why do bees have sticky hair?"
"I don't know, why?" asks Ellie.
" 'Cause they live in a honeycomb."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
|
posted by Nadine @ 6:20 PM   |
|
|
|
| Monday, October 24, 2005 |
| Wasted away again in Margaritaville |
Oh no. Oh no, no, no.
As I am looking into my toilet, I am having a flashback of my 21st birthday. That was the last time the porcelain god and I had a chat.
Place: Guadalahara's
Time: 8pm
Who: Me, hubby & 2 friends
Why? 6th year wedding anniversary
The waiter, Isiac, asks me something that contained 7 little words that started me down that terrible path.
"Can I get you something to drink?"
"I'll have a margarita on the rocks, please" I said. An hour later I ordered another one. Well....within that hour I not only finished the jumbo Margarita, but had a shot of Jager and a Red Headed Slut. So, after getting the 2nd Margarita had a shot of Buttery Nipple and a Tequila shot. Why? I don't know. I don't know what time we came home, but 10 minutes inside the house and I headed upstairs to my room. I did 90 mph around the corner heading to my bathroom and ran SMACK into my closet threshold. I thought, "Hmmm....Thats gonna leave a mark". From that point on I proceeded to barf my ENTIRE large and small intestine and a 1/4 of my liver. It was like my eyeballs had bungee cords on them. Everytime I puked or dry-heaved they came out of the socket, dipped in the water and smacked back into my face. I'm not sure how long I was passed out there, but when I came to and tried to find the bed I realized my husband was snoring in the bed. I thought "way to look out for your wife jackass" as I'm struggling to get my clothes off. I continued to puke until approximately 10am the next morning. Between the dislocated shoulder (the closet) and the 12 broken ribs from puking, I feel like I was in an Ultimate Fighting match.
So, I will have you know that I am no longer consuming alcoholic beverages and have chopped off Jose Cuervos balls for putting me through this.
|
| posted by Nadine @ 8:15 PM |
|
|
|
| Friday, October 21, 2005 |
| More irony..... |
REDWOOD CITY, Calif. -- Victor Willis, the original policeman in the 1970s music group the Village People, was being sought after failing to show up Thursday for sentencing of possession of a firearm and crack cocaine.
Oh the irony makes me chuckle. I can see the cop arresting him...
"Mr. Willis can you please turn around so I can cuff you because... its.... NACHO, NACHO day. Its gotta suck to be you today....REPEAT CHORUS.
|
| posted by Nadine @ 8:10 PM |
|
|
|
| Thursday, October 20, 2005 |
| SCHOOL DAZE |
Saw this over at Soapbox's page....She ain't got nuttin' on me. Am I hot or what? The white dress is 6th grade. I had a nice rack for 12 yrs old. The belt was dope as shit, huh? The dyke haircut and braces added a nice touch. You can't see it, but I'm wearing STARK white heels, too. YUMMY! And to think I wondered why I never had a boyfriend. The other pic with me in the dress is my 9th grade dance. I went with Casey Horton who shows up in a Tubbs & Crockett sea blue jacket with boatshoes. I hope you take notice of the dress. SAME DRESS, SAME DANCE as Soapbox...TOTALLY NOT PLANNED! The last pic, well....I'm not sure what I like better. The colors of the suit (it brought out my eyes), or the dorky ass stance that they made me do. Personally, I would've preferred the Bikini cut to give me that 'long leg' look.
|
| posted by Nadine @ 8:41 PM |
|
|
|
|
| The Sellecks |
Flipping through soome pics from some months ago, I came across this one. My neighbor Jim has had a loving relationship with his mustache. He's old enough to be my Dad, but I get along with him like a brother. I've seen some early 80's pics of him and he had the TOTAL TOM SELLECK MUSTACHE. Since, he has trimmed it, but his daughter & I always make comments about his stache. Well, I guess my daughter overhears too much and came in the kitchen with a piece of tape that she colored a thick, black mustache on and stuck it on her upper lip. I thought we were going to piss our pants. She totally has my sense of humor ;0)
|
| posted by Nadine @ 8:14 PM |
|
|
|
|
| The irony...... |
Michael Jackson has been called for jury duty.....uh...what? He says that he now lives completely outside the U.S., so he will be exempt. I wonder what the persons face looked like who pulls these names? I wonder if...for a split second...he looked around to see if Ashton Kutcher was running towards him.
|
| posted by Nadine @ 1:06 PM |
|
|
|
| Thursday, October 13, 2005 |
| I'm an AUNT!!!! |
I just found out yesterday that I am going to be an Auntie! My sister is due June 1st. She has been married for a little over 2 years and has been with her husband for 12 years. We all expected her to get prego as soon as she got married and we have been waiting 2 years! I'm so happy for her and can't wait to smooch that fat snufalumpkins in June.
|
| posted by Nadine @ 8:18 AM |
|
|
|
| Monday, October 10, 2005 |
| * NEWSFLASH *...Santa Claus claims bankruptcy |
My daughter has hit that age where Christmas is the one and only thing she lives and breathes for. She decided to go onto KBToys.com and make a Christmas list. Kinda smart if you think about it. I guess she is able to shop, preview and take note to the ratings and opinion stats on each toy. The list is approximately 5 pages front & back on minila paper. Hopefully I can read it all...by the time she got to #40 the handwriting looks like she has Parkinsons. I will copy every word as she wrote it. So here it goes:
1. Color & Style Head- Teresa
2. Dora's Talking House
3. My talking backpak
4. Super Spies (GBA)....I askd what this GBA is. She said it was a Game Boy game. I said that you need a Game Boy to play it. She gave me a look, like, duh, that'll be on my list, too.
5. Dress up adventure
6. Disny princess shoes 4-pack
7. Fur real friends smoochie quq tan.
8. Fur real fiends New born puppy beige and brown.
9. Fur real friends smoochie pup-white...i guess the tan just isn't enough
10. Fur real friends newborn kitten:beige
11. FurReal Friends puppy: gray & wihte
12. Fur Real Friends Newborn puppy-brown
13. Fur real friends newborn puppy back & wihte
14. Little people ABC Zoo
15. Doodle Bear Magic Glow-pink
16. Fur real friends Go Go My Walkin' Pup
17. Dora the Explorer 5-in-1 Play N Fun
18. Barbie vehicle
19. Dora the E
20. Dora the Explorer Flip-open sofa
21. Dora reusable placemat
22. Dora the Explorer lawn swing
23. Splash around Dora & Boots
24. Easy-Bake Real Meal Oven
25. Play-Doh choice of colors
26. Slurpee maker
27. Funny
28. Chika chicka boom boom
29. Brats: Rock Angelz (DVD)
30. Magnetic Fishing Game
31. Bendables: Family Guy collectible boxed set
32. Happy Family Midget Baby....i assume its midget, can't read it
33. Barbie Wide board Switchboard
34. Disney Princess: Sierra doll travel system
35. New baby Born function doll
36. Dressy Bessy
37. Barbie Desk Top computer
38. Sweet Hearts Jewelry Kit
39. Bratz: Oh La La Lip Gloss counter
40. Cabbage patch babies: girl with blond hiar.
Hmmm, seems she didn't do spell check. However, puncuation a plus. Loved the :, and the (). I'm not sure if you noticed, but I think she wants a Fur Real Friends animal. Hate to break it to her, but #39...don't think so. You're 7...Oh La La is not in your vocab yet. Well, I'm off to Lending Tree to take out an Equity Line for Christmas.....
Have a great day!
|
| posted by Nadine @ 2:10 PM |
|
|
|
|
|
